Pet Sematary, Life After Beth, and Burying the Ex.
Before you bust out the Tomatometer, allow me to admit that neither of the three films I’ll be presenting today are perfect. Pet Semary is practically horror aged into comedy, and Life after Beth and Burying the Ex both pale in comparison to other Hor-Com-Zom-Roms out there, but if back in the mood for zombies, and you’re looking for something a tad bit silly and predominately fun, then these three babies are definitely worth a look.
What Pet Sematary, Burying the Ex, and Life After Beth share in common is their unquestionable ability to embody exactly what Jud Crandall (Fred Gwynne of The Munsters fame) meant when he insisted that, “sometimes, dead is better.” As such, all three films offer a quirky take on the idea that some things are best left in the past. So, whether you’re a fan of family dramas or craving another example the crazy ex-girlfriend trope, I hereby present to you three times when dead was most certainly, without a doubt, to the best of anyone’s knowledge better.
Pet Sematary: or, The OG Ghosts vs Zombies
If you haven’t watched the 1989 film adaptation of Stephen King’s horror novel Pet Sematary, then it’s time fasten your britches and give it a go. Considering the revival Stephen King is having at the moment—think Hulu’s Castle Rock and the silver screen giant that is It—you really should give in and enjoy this nugget of cult classic gold before the remake comes out in 2019.
Someplace within of its brain splattered interior, Pet Sematary is about the havoc families can visit upon each other. At its bones, it’s about dealing with the loss of loved ones. The literal pet cemetery from the film is the cite of our first loss in life—the one meant to prepare us for every other loss ahead. It’s when the living can’t deal with the idea of dying that the horror begins. None of the characters in Stephen King’s Pet Sematary have a healthy relationship with death, and it is from this deficiency that their downfall stems.
Shortly after Chicago doctor Louis Creed moves his family to the remote town of Ludlow, their well-meaning neighbor, Jud Crandall, introduces them to the local “pet sematary”. When Jud attributes the necessity for this fixture to a dangerous county highway running right in front of the Creed’s new home, it becomes clear that nothing good is about to happen.
Still, it isn’t until the ghost of Victor Pascow, Louis’ deceased patient, appears to Louis in a vision that things take a turn for the worst. Pascow tries to warn Louis to never go to the burial grounds beyond the pet cemetery, but he really should have saved his ghostly intervention for someone else. To no one’s surprise, when the family cat is gets run down Jud and Louis embark on an ill-advised quest to bury—and in turn resurrect—the deceased feline in the “sour” soils beyond the pet cemetery. This valid desire to shield a child from the realities of life and death, however, turns dark when the road claims yet another victim—one of the two-legged variety. Tempted by the power to conquer death, Louis brings about the mechanism of his family’s demise: the living dead.
Life After Beth: or, when forever starts to last too long
It would be completely reasonable for you to watch Life After Beth for the mere pleasure of experiencing one more glimmer of Aubrey Plaza’s comedic talent. If you need another reason, then consider accepting fun with zombies for the mere sake of having fun with zombies. We never discover why the dead are suddenly coming back to life in Life After Beth and honestly, it doesn’t really matter. So, strap on your seatbelt and come along for the ride as we discover that sometimes the partner you thought you wanted isn’t so great after all.
Zach Orfman (Dane DeHaan) is reduced to a sitting-by-the-pool, staring-out-into-nothing, all-black-everything mess when his girlfriend Beth Slocum (Plaza) dies of a snakebite while taking that lone hike he never managed to join her on.
As feelings begin to wane, and humanity begins to fight for its last chance of survival, Life After Beth provides us with care
Burying the Ex: or, why you shouldn’t make hasty promises
Even the undeniable charms of gone-too-soon star Anton Yelchin couldn’t save Burying the Ex from a sleuth of negative reviews, but if you’re open to 99 minutes of dark cheer, then you ought to give this 2015 gem a try. Burying the Ex is a Hor-Com ride into the depths of crazy ex-girlfriends from a time just before Rachel Bloom’s hit series, Crazy Ex
Max (Yelchin) is a classic movie nice-guy, who has somehow managed to catch Evelyn (Ashley Greene), his dream-girl turned nightmare. Controlling, manipulative, and unable to understand Max’s horror memorabilia shop dreams, Evelyn proves to be an imperfect match. Lacking the guts to break up with his girlfriend, however, Max leaves his problems to be solved by an ultimate deus ex machina in the form of a bus, which abruptly ends Evelyn’s life. This appears to clear the path for everlasting happiness with Olivia, an equally horror-obsessed malt shop owner Max meets earlier in the film, but this movie wouldn’t be a proper Zom-Com if Evelyn didn’t somehow manage to dig herself out of an early grave. Hellbent on exacting Max’s promise that they’d be together forever, Evelyn comes back to put his happy ending with Olivia in serious jeopardy. Lives hang on the line as Burying the Ex reminds why us why, way back in 1697, William Congreve insisted that hell has no fury like a woman scorned.
So, I hope you enjoyed this list of “sometimes, dead is better” films. Let me know what you think of them and be sure to share your own favorite when-the-living-should-stay-dead features.
